"To exploit your opponents' weaknesses, you must first explore your own"- Quote from an old Adidas t-shirt, tacked above my bed in PA.

 There are some words in which we truly live by, and this quote happens to be one of my life mantras. Whether applied to athletics, academics, extracurricular activities or relationships, my goal was always to have the upper hand in any situation. The way to prepare for opposition is to build your strengths while working to diminish your weaknesses. My obsession with this idea of self improvement coupled with my innate competitive edge may be why I am one of the most self critical people that I know.  

Much has changed since a thirteen year old girl decided to take on the world, one Adidas motto at a time. Though times change, some things remain with us and I often find myself reflecting on my old mantra once again. What does it look like to have the same drive and determination in a life devoted to God?  How do you explore your weaknesses and prepare yourself to follow Jesus through opposition? How do I work to diminish my weaknesses in this new context of a life of ministry?

I have been pondering these questions for awhile,and I truly believe that God is revealing to me areas of weakness that I need to actively work on over the summer in order to prepare for this next season of life.

1. Consistency and discipline... Whether it be devotions, prayer, study, using gifts, sharing faith or any other aspect of life, I need to be the same person regardless of my surroundings. I need  remain connected to God and who He has created me to be 100% of the time. 
2. Image and Insecurity...  My insecurities surrounding my image- both in terms of body image and personality- are ridiculous. They effect how I interact with others, and could continue to hinder my effectiveness in ministry. The solution is that I need to healthily get back into physical shape and rebuild my sense of identity. 90% of my current struggles are rooted in my own insecurities, and reestablishing my self confidence will definitely diminish one of  the devil's favorite footholes in my life and some of my favorite excuses.
3. Unapologetic Worship... I love God, but all too often I tone down who I am and how I worship Him out of fear of offending others or embarrassing myself.  The word worship is translated from two different words in Greek - latreia meaning to serve or ministry, and proskyneo meaning to take a posture of submission. Whether it is ministering to people or submitting to God, I need to begin to worship unashamedly and wholeheartedly. This category has a more specific applications in terms of writing and music- both of which I will explain in more detail in a later post.

As I explore my own weakness, I am reminded that that exploitation is no longer the goal. The goal is to glorify God. My attitude is slowly transitioning towards the mantra of Paul:

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." -2 Corinthians 12:9:

Amen. I am weak, but I serve a mighty God... and I am so excited to see how He can use even me to build His Kingdom. Here's to exploring weakness and wearing it on my sleeve for the world to see.